Since I can remember I think I have always known what I wanted to do in life. I’ve always dreamed big, maybe too big at times but that is never a bad thing. I think a part of my ambition at such an early age stemmed from all of the books I used to read. Saying that I was book worm was an understatement. I lived and breathed fictional adventures full of promise, hope and opulence.
For me school wasn’t something I hated. I always turned up on time for class with an eagerness and willingness to learn. It wasn’t just one subject that got my full attention I was enthused by literally anything from history, science, English art, everything except math’s really. Math’s and I had an interesting relationship throughout my school life. Due to my love of learning I was pretty settled on a career in law or medicine, so that is what I set my sights on all through my secondary school career.
Like all good plans they rarely seem to go the way you want them too. When applying to UCAS for university degrees I had settled on the medical route. The day of collecting my A’level results I was filled with excitement about what my future may bring. With my head in the clouds I quickly came crashing back down to Earth with a loud bang! That solitary brown envelope that I clutched in my hand didn’t contain what I had expected. Don’t get me wrong I gained really good A ‘level results, but they were just not good enough to meet my two university offers to study medicine.
There are either 2 ways that this could have gone. I could have burst into tears and raged about how unfair life is or take it in my stride and go back to the drawing board. I chose the latter, not a single tear was shed and it was straight to the computer to check out which courses were still available via clearing. My friend rang me (who had ended up in the same situation as me) and told me about a Medical Genetics course that gave you the experience to pursue a postgraduate medical degree. So that’s where I ended up, studying Medical Genetics with my best friend and I had the best time of my life and it’s where I met Alfie.
During my course I applied for a postgraduate medical course and managed to get an interview at one university. Unfortunately this plan didn’t pan out either as I didn’t even get offered a place on the course. By this time I was completely stumped, what do I do now? Rather than go into complete meltdown I decided to give up on medicine all together. I’d tried twice now and had got pretty close on both occasions, just not close enough. Instead after graduating I decided to get some life experience; I ended up moving in with Alfie and working full time at my part time retail job.
At the time I can remember being quite content with my job, but as the same routine set in I knew that I wanted something more. This is when I got onto the PhD route, which is a natural progression after graduating from a life sciences degree. A part of me was filled with dread; if I’m not good enough for medicine then how can I get someone to offer me a PhD? But, luck seemed to be on my side as after my second PhD interview I was offered a position to study neurobiology and it just so happened to be at the same university where Alfie was now studying postgraduate medicine. We moved to Warwickshire to embark on our new lives.
Going back to my recent post I have never felt really comfortable during my PhD, more like a fish out of water. I’ve never claimed to be super intelligent I’ve always just been determined and worked hard. Sometimes I have to process things a couple of times for them to sink in, whereas other people in my lab seemed to get things instantaneously. In recent weeks I have documented that I was about to take my PhD viva exam. The thought of it filled me with dread even in the first year of my PhD but the day was inevitable no matter hard I tried to forget about it. For the last two and a half weeks I have been reading scientific journals and re-reading my thesis to the point of mental torture I’m sure.
Wednesday 20th February was D-Day. At 12.30am I was confronted by my two examiners who were both really lovely and kind. The grilling session, the confusion, the blubbering tears and perspiration on my forehead that I had envisioned never came to nothing. These were replaced with laughter, constructive criticism and perhaps one of the most intellectual conversations I will probably ever have. Less than two hours later I was informed “Congratulations, we are happy to tell you that you have passed your viva.”
I’ve achieved what I thought for me was impossible, I have my PhD!
Alfie and I had a funny moment yesterday morning. I had woken up and said “morning doctor” and he responded with “morning doctor!” I could do nothing but smile. In all my years (well there are only 26 of them!) I have never felt so proud of myself. After all of the self-doubt and worry I had set out what I wanted to achieve. A little girl with her big dreams of wanting to achieve something in her life had come good! I’m so overwhelmed by it all that I can’t quite believe it.
Dream big, never give up and your dreams really can come true!
What is your big dream?
Have your dreams come true yet?
Congrats on getting your phd, fantastic achievement!
Thanks Lauren!
That is amazing Jemma, well done- huge congratulations! 🙂
Thank you Maria! 🙂
I always read,never comment, but had too today. A big congratulations to you. What an inspiration! 🙂
Aww thanks so much! Thank you for commenting, it’s lovely to hear from you. 🙂
Congress!! It’s a huge achievement!!
Thank you.;
Congratulations! That’s wonderful news well done!
Thanks Laura!!
CONGRATULATIONS Jemma! You deserve it and even more for your dogged determination, hard working and the courage to keep on going. I love this post, you are inspirational!
Thank you Claire. It has been a struggle but I got there in the end 🙂
That’s awesome news! Congratulations, Jemma! (or should I say, Dr. Jemma :)) It’s great to see that dreaming big pays off 🙂 Now go celebrate!
Jamie
It really did pay off, thank you!
Congratulations, Jemma! This is such an amazing achievement, I can’t even imagine the amount of work you put into your degree – and it has truly paid off.
Thanks so much!
I’ve said before how much I admire how you’ve handled your PhD – you work hard for your dreams, and you deserve every one of them to come true. I’m so delighted for you and massive, *huge* congratulations.
I empathise so much with not feeling good enough, bright enough or up to some people’s standards. You’re inspiring evidence that it’s possible to prove everyone that has ever doubted you so very wrong.
xxx
Thank you Jess. I think it is common for a lot of us in academia to feel inadequate in our surroundings. But faith and finding the confidence in your work really helps. x
Congratulations Dr Jemma!!!! That is fantastic news, well done! I’m really glad you enjoyed your viva – I had hoped it would be like that for you. We had a similar moment when I got mine because my sister’s a medic – we went to sleep saying “Goodnight Doctor” to each other over and over, when my brother then interrupted our fun by saying “Goodnight NERDS” (he doesn’t have a PhD or a medical degree and is the Cool One). Enjoy your achievement – you deserve it! xxx
Thank you. It was quite enjoyable and not what I expected at all. I was expecting a grilling lol! x
Congratulations Jemma or should I say Dr J! what an amazing story and blog post!!! I certainly believe that we all have a calling & fate exists, and life has a habit of giving us what we wanted all along even when we didn’t realise it at the time. I am myself a medic, so I can relate to this post a lot! wish you all the best for your future together Dr&Dr 🙂 xxx
Hehehe! I like the sound of Dr J. Thank you, fate has certainly worked it’s wonders this week.
Congratulations! Oh wow what an achievement. No one can ever take that away from you 🙂
Than you Anna.
Congrats!!!!!!!!!
Thanks Tam!
CONGRATULATIONS!! Wohoo!!! 🙂 My dream was to become a dentist and, like you, my dream came true through hard work…I had a little moment, like yours but with my dad – he rang up and said “Heeeyyyy…..what’s up Doc?” Best moment ever! 🙂 go celebrate!!
Thank you! Haha! It seems the Doctor moment is a common theme.
congratulations! What a great accomplishment! 🙂
Thank you! 🙂
Congratulations, Jemma. I’m another often-reads, rarely comments. You give me hope for my own as I enter the final (very final!) few months of writing up. I have a huge fear of ‘revise and resubmit’ at the moment. I think I need to channel some of your optimism and hope! I hope you’ve good plans for this weekend and don’t have to work too hard.
Thank you for taking the time to comment. I love hearing from my readers. You will be great. You have worked so hard to get to this point. Just be confident in your work and then you can’t go wrong!
Yey well done, congratulations, you’ve worked so hard! x
Thanks Ffion! x
Well done again Dr! I knew you’d have no problem passing – under two hours is really impressive! x
Congratulations Jemma, this post made me go all shivery! You’ve worked so hard for so long and you deserve all your success. To keep going like you have is brilliant and just shows you should never give up on a dream… you’re an inspiration 🙂 xx
Well done. I completely understand how you feel. Looking forward to finishing my PhD too!