Now that we’re coming to the end of my second pregnancy, I’ve obviously been thinking ahead towards the birth and how I would like things to go in an ideal world. I know that many experience the most wonderful births and they have gone exactly as they had wished, and then there are others that aren’t any less beautiful, but perhaps not gone to plan and changes have had to be made for the safety of the mama and baby.
I’m totally OK with having to go off plan, especially if it’s medically necessary. Experience from my last labour has shown me first hand that things can change all of a sudden and it’s better to go in with some flexibility to mitigate any disappointment if things don’t end up going your way.
Like last time I would like a natural birth (I hate that term, all births are natural, but you know what I mean!), however, if it came down to needing a c-section for the safety of my baby I wouldn’t protest and gladly go ahead with this option. We were in the delivery suite last time, just me, my midwife and Alfie, and although we weren’t on the midwifery-led unit, it was all very lovely – well, as lovely as it can be while you’re pushing out a tiny human. This time I plan on heading to the midwifery-led unit for a water birth. I had a couple of baths while labouring at home before heading to the hospital and found them so relaxing, so knew instantly that this was the best option for me this time if possible.
One thing that I have noticed with this pregnancy is how relaxed I am. Last time I was so determined to get everything ready so early on. However, this time around I’ve just been going with the flow, mainly because I’m more confident in the knowledge that whatever happens as long as our baby is strong and healthy that’s all that matters, making the nursery looking pretty and buying clothes can wait. Although, my midwife has been pressing me for my birth preferences for weeks now and I thought writing a blog post about it would actually help get my butt in gear. Plus, I’ve had a couple of questions about it so thought it would be easier to share it here. It’s pretty much based on my last one with a few tweaks.
First stage of labour
- I would prefer to labour at home for as long as possible with no medical intervention.
Second stage of labour
- If possible I’d like to use the birthing pool.
- Ideally, I want to have an active labour and be able to walk and move around to allow gravity to do its work.
- I want to handle the pain using natural methods such as breathing, massage, relaxation, birthing pool, but would like the option of gas and air.
- Intermittent monitoring of the baby to allow me to move around as much as possible.
- I’d like to try different positions to help me remain comfortable, particularly use of a pregnancy ball.
- Natural methods to prevent tearing such as compresses, massage and breathing techniques. No episiotomy unless medically needed.
- Immediate skin-to-skin contact after birth and postpone any procedures.
- Wait for the cord to stop pulsating before clamping.
Third stage of labour
- I would prefer the placenta to be born spontaneously without the use of pitocin, unless medically needed.
Similarly, like last time, I’m calling these my ‘Birth Preferences’ over birth plan because you can never plan the perfect birth. With that it mind, since we live about 25 minutes from the hospital and second labours are supposed to be much speedier, I’m also getting mentally prepared for a home birth, just in case. Evidence that you can’t plan for the perfect birth because literally, anything can happen.
One thing that has come to my attention after speaking to my midwife is that the hospital is actually supports immediate skin-to-skin contact and delayed cord clamping, which I thought was really positive, but I’ve still included it just so they are aware. Also, last time, I didn’t do anything with my placenta. I know this can be a divisive topic, but I have been considering placenta encapsulation to support my recovery. I would hate to think of all of those health benefits going to the incinerator, although I’m not 100% yet because it’s not exactly cheap, let’s be honest!
I hope everything goes well for you and your baby.
Having given birth 3 times in 5 years, 2009,2010 and again in 2014,I have to make a comment. All of my labours went quickly, the longest lasted 4 hours, so I’m not one to complain about that aspect.
My two first two times giving birth were with the use of breathing methods only as I, at that time, had an idea of that way as being ideal and most natural for the baby and I.
The third time, due to a number of known health issues, me, not the baby, I had an planned epidural. This led to almost no pain during the seance. Had I known this, and had I been less stubborn and narrow-minded in my view on how the most ideal way to give birth is, I would without a doubt, have had epidural the first two times as well.
Though, if not considering the pain being out of the picture, I must say that I had a much clearer comprehension of what was going on in my two first births. It was quite weird and surreal to not feel a thing and then, boom, the baby arrived.
Good luck to you and all of you. Looking forward to seeing the little new one. 🌝
Thank you! Wow, they were very fast labours. My first was 40 hours long!! Fingers crossed this one will be much faster. These babies like to keep us on our toes, don’t they? 🙂 I’m hoping everything goes to plan, but obviously I’m happy to go with the flow as long as the baby is safe.
I had emergency c-section with my first child and also needed a c-section with my second baby. Although I really wanted to have natural birth, it seems that my body is not made for it!
Aww, bless you! These things happen and as long as you and your babies are strong and healthy that’s all that matters.
Looks like your time is drawing close and you must be so excited! Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy and hope your delivery and birth preference goes on as planned.
Yes, so close now…eek! Thank you so much. 🙂
I like your relaxed and open approach to your plan. Things can never be predicted, but you can be partially prepared. It could be an option to donate your placenta, but I’m not sure how this works. I’m sure your midwife would be able to give you details if this were available. Hope it all goes well for you.
Your birth preferences sound very similar to mine! I’m 39+1 today and I’m hoping that my second labour will be far more “natural” than my first. I definitely want Gas and Air available to me though, I definitely couldn’t go through labour without some form of drug related pain relief.
Oooh, you’re so close. I hope baby doesn’t keep you waiting for too long. I used gas and air last time and it was amazing!
Your birth preferences sound great, I hope you manage to get what you prefer and I hope your pregnancy goes as smoothly as possible for you, good luck!
I have had 3 ‘natural’ births and didn’t mind how the baby arrived as long as it was safe and preferably quick! I was induced with my final pregnancy as he was 2 weeks overdue 🙁 All of my births went smoothly and I hope yours goes well too
Thank you! I don’t mind how she comes either really, just as long as she’s happy and healthy.
It’s a great idea to call it birth preference, things can happy so quickly plans suddenly need to change and mums get upset. Its a long time ago since I had my daughter and birth plans weren’t really a thing, we were just told our options. I’d like to think I would have been like you and kept it as natural as possible unless something happened and it needed to change.
I didn’t realise that birth plans/preferences were relatively a new thing. I think it’s sad that you were basically told what to do rather than being able to guide the whole process.