One thing that I wasn’t really prepared for when I fell pregnant was the emotional and physical journey that I was about to embark on. Of course, I knew that my life was never going to be the same again once the new baby arrived, but what struck me is how many changes you experience over the 9 months brewing a baby.
Pregnancy really puts your body through its paces, all those raging hormones and being stretched and bigger in all different directions, it’s the ultimate test for the female body. Pelvic health physios can guide you through this process, ensuring you’re best equipped both physically and mentally for any challenges encountered. Since giving birth to my little dude 19-months ago, I’ve noticed that it’s undergone some post-pregnancy transformations. My hips and thighs are wider than before; my already curvy butt has gained more curves; there are extra stretch marks on my thighs; my boobs resemble used tea bags after breastfeeding; my belly jiggles and I have a pouch which hangs down when I even remotely attempt something that resembles a plank. I think you get the picture, like the billions of women who have given birth before me, your body changes and it will never be the same again.
Like most women, I look at these changes in the mirror or when I’m getting ready and there are days when I hate them. Heavens, I know 30 isn’t in the slightest bit old, but things seemed to be more taught and toned when I was in my early 20s. I loved being pregnant, it was a wonderful and enlightening experience, however, it did leave me feeling a bit lacklustre and dimmed my glow. Then I have those days when I feel empowered by my curves and post-pregnancy body and most of this can be put down to the gratitude that I feel when I look at my little boy and everything that my body has achieved to help bring him into this world.
I know that I’m not on my own and I’m very lucky that I didn’t gain a huge amount of weight during my pregnancy. However, I can definitely feel and see the effects that having a baby has had on my body, extra curves, belly jiggle and all. It can really knock your confidence and self-esteem, seeing how different your body has become and the fact that your pre-pregnancy wardrobe isn’t going to fit anytime soon. Early on after giving birth there were days where I just couldn’t be bothered to make an effort and it wasn’t through tiredness, it was because I thought that it was a lost cause. Sure a slick of lipstick and a nice dress can make you feel instantly great, but when you take them off you’re still left with that vulnerable insecure feeling that having a low-self esteem can bring.
I haven’t rushed to regain my pre-baby figure, there’s been no 6-week boot camp or detox plan. For one, where on earth do people find the time to exercise that much and prepare a decent meal so early as a new mum? My fingers are heavily pointing in the direction of celebrities with their large bank accounts and huge teams of helpers. This isn’t reality. The reality is that sometimes it’s a struggle to run a brush through your hair with a new baby let alone getting into the kitchen to cook a healthy dinner for the family. I decided to take the slow route and enjoy my baby – even now, 19-months on, I do what I can when I can and I’m happy with that. 
In time, once I’d settled into my new role and found a makeshift routine that worked for us, things got easier and I was able to find some time for me again. Having a baby takes over every part of your life and having some time to take care of yourself is key – it’s so important to look after yourself so that you can care for your loved ones the best you can. When I began to make some time for myself this is when I really felt better about myself. There are days when I look in the mirror and don’t recognise this new body, this new form that it has taken to assist me in my new role. However, now I’m genuinely happy with how pregnancy has left my body. As previously mentioned, I have days when I feel uncomfortable with my new body, but generally, I’m happy because it tells a story of a life-changing and wonderful journey full of hope and happiness.
My body is different and will never be the same again, but I’ve become more accepting and more forgiving towards it. Over those long 9 months, it supported me and my growing baby and showed great courage through labour. Now it’s time for me to give back, and show my gratitude for all it has done for me and all it has given me. Without its strength, my little boy wouldn’t be here with us now and I couldn’t imagine my life without him and his big beaming smile.
Basically, what I want to say is don’t put any pressure on yourself, you’re doing a fabulous job and it took me a while to realise this. Motherhood is hard, but breathe it all in and cherish those precious moments with your baby; nourish and love your body the best way that you can and in moments of doubt always remember to give your new mama-body a high-five because it’s just freaking awesome!
SO refreshing to read. I mean I think you look fantastic and pretty much the same as before you were pregnant! But I understand that you really only know your own body and how you feel in it, whereas outsiders won’t. It’s awful to live in a world where mothers are judged on their bodies first and foremost. It needs to change!
Thanks Anna, that’s very lovely of you to say! Definitely, too much pressure is put on new mums to snap back into shape, but the reality is your body is never going to be the same again. I think the media have a huge influence in this department too.
For us guys it creeps up on us. My life event was always being tired and it finally motivated me to do something about it.
Good for you Scott!
Your right, it does change your body but I am so thankful that you have accepted the changes and are promoting body positivity. I think that is really brave of you to be so honest and open!
Thanks Ana! I think more body positive posts, especially around post-pregnancy bodies need to be out there.
I’m not a mom yet, but that’s something my mom always told me. And I’m happy you came to the conclusion about not putting pressure on yourself. Real beauty comes from the inside out! 🙂
So lovely that you have such a wonderful attitude to your body Renata!
I agree it takes a while to fully be happy with a post baby body. I was lucky that I didnt get any stretch marks but boobs! What happened to those lovely things? Used teabags, exactly. Oh well thats the way it was.
Ha! Used teabags…I am missing the boobs I have to say.
Pregnancy and birth change our bodies so much, and it can come as a shock! I look at my body, and while I might not love it, I am proud of what it has done. Fantastic post that every new mum should read!
Thank you Kate, glad you enjoyed it. That’s the thing, at times we may hate our new bodies, but we have to think about the amazing thing it has achieved.
I too have struggled with my post pregnancy body. Three children have certainly taken their toll. I’m not in a rush to change either so take simple steps each day instead.
You sound like you have a brilliant mindset Chelle!
My body went back to a nice shape not long after so didn’t really look after myself and now I hate the way I look sadly c
I hope you find a happy place and learn to love your body again Viki.
I think everyone struggles with their body after having a baby, I think anyone would be lying if they said they didn’t. You’ve just got to realise your body is like that because you’ve been homing a baby for9 months and a little lumps and bumps here and there are so worth it. Such a refreshing post to read!
Totally Ashleigh! There is a perfectly good reason why your body has changed and it’s done something incredible.
My body changed so much and it was hard to deal with, my boy is now 7 and I’m now back to how I looked before I had Joe – it’s been a long, hard slog.
Good for you for getting to back to where you want to be! 🙂
This is something I really needed to read. I’m 24, and though my plans to have a child aren’t for some time yet, my partner and I regularly discuss the time we can become a family with a little piece of each of us to nurture. The problem is that I’ve struggled with anorexia for over a decade. I’m scraping by at a minimally healthy weight, but I’m terrified that my relationship with my body will always taint my experiences of motherhood. I don’t want this for myself, and definitely not for my future child. I am really hopeful that – like yourself – I can come to see that any changes can simply come to signify a magical journey and the birth of a new life.
I love following your story on this blog, and have always find your posts so inspiring but today this read was so pertinent to me. Thank you! x
Thank you so much for taking the time to comment. Sorry to hear about your struggle. I can’t even imagine what demons you have battled over the last decade. I’m happy to hear that you are back at a healthy weight, even if it is minimal, it’s definitely a positive step in the right direction and you should be extremely proud.
We all struggle with nurturing a healthy relationship with ourselves at some points in our lives, some more extreme than others. Getting back to a healthy weight shows that you do care and want to love and nourish your body. Obviously, I don’t know the full story, but It sounds like you are in a much better place and this is something that is worth building on. It’s all about baby steps and taking things slowly, but they will eventually turn into something awesome. Take your time, there’s no need to rush!
Learning to love yourself first, certainly means that we can look after our loved ones the best we can and you seem to be on the right path….keep going! You have given so much already and have shown so much courage, which are perfect qualities to bring a new life into this world.
If you ever need to talk, about anything, feel free to drop me an email or private message me on social media. xxx
Its hard to accept changes in your body, especially when they’re out of your control. Like you say, your body did something amazing during pregnancy and birth but you are still you underneath it all. So of course its going to be strange when you look in the mirror and you don’t look like you. My eldest is almost 12, and my youngest is 18 months and I relate to so much of this. I’m still not used to the changes but I’m learning to accept them xx
So true! I think the point about it being out of your control is one of the reasons why it can be so hard to come to terms with.
Pregnancy didn’t change my body but birth did. Took me a long time to learn to love my body again. Great post Jemma
I think it takes us all a long time to love our new bodies, perfectly normal.
I cannot Thank you enough for this post.Ive been struggling with my self esteem in getting to know my new body and it seems that other mums sare looking great but despite killing myself to get to the gym for 1hour every week on minimal sleep and eating whatever I can whenever I can (very little) My body image still haunts me but, this article has put things in to perspective for me. I knew all this before but sometimes it’s nice to know that we’re not alone in feeling like this. Also the importance of nourishing this amazing vessel that was home to my baby and grew her in to my life. Thank you for your honesty.
My pleasure lovely, I’m so happy that you’ve taken the time to comment on this post and found it helpful. I wrote it for that exact reason, there are probably 1000’s of new mums going through the same thing, but it’s not something that is spoken about so openly.
We’re so hard on ourselves and forced into thinking that we need to snap back into shape after having a baby, but the reality is, even if you did get back to our original size our bodies will never be the same. Our bodies go through so much during pregnancy that it would be a tough ask for it to go back to how it was. Instead, I think a more positive outlook is to appreciate these changes and what our body have done for us.