How to stop putting your life on hold and start choosing you with Nicola Rae

There’s a quiet ache many women carry, especially mothers, the ache of putting life on hold.

  • Waiting for the chaos to ease.
  • Waiting until the kids are older.
  • Waiting until work calms down.
  • Waiting until they feel ready.

But as coach Nicola Rae reminds us in this powerful episode, “You don’t have to wait for your life.”

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What Does It Mean to Stop Waiting?

For Nicola, this wasn’t just a catchy phrase — it was a deep personal truth, born from her own experience of realising she had spent years putting herself last. There wasn’t one big moment where everything changed, but rather a slow-burning awakening: a quiet knowing that the life she was waiting for… wasn’t going to magically appear.

She had to choose it.

She had to reclaim it.

And that’s what she helps other women do now — especially those who feel stuck in the cycle of someday.

What Keeps Women Waiting?

Through her coaching, Nicola has seen how often women feel like they need permission to choose themselves.

They wait for the “perfect time” — when the calendar clears, when the guilt lifts, when someone says, now it’s your turn.

But that time rarely comes on its own. And while they wait, their needs get pushed further down the list, until they can barely remember what those needs were.

Reclaiming Your Power When You Feel Disconnected

So what do you do when you’re feeling depleted and unsure where to start?

Nicola offers this: Start small. Start honest. Start where you are.

Reclaiming your life doesn’t mean overhauling everything overnight. It means gently turning toward yourself again. Listening to the quiet voice inside that’s been drowned out by noise, expectations, and relentless to-do lists.

Maybe it means asking, What do I need today — not forever, just today?
Maybe it means putting your phone down and your hand on your heart.
Maybe it means asking for help — and letting yourself receive it.

“I Want More, But I Don’t Even Know What I Want Anymore…”

This episode speaks directly to the woman who’s feeling lost in her own life.

Nicola reminds us that this is a common — and completely human — place to be. When you’ve spent years pouring into others, it makes sense that your own desires feel blurry. But that doesn’t mean they’re gone.

You are still in there.
You are still worthy.
And the first step might simply be admitting that you want more — without knowing what that more is yet.

Challenging the Inner Stories That Keep You Small

One of the most important shifts Nicola sees in her clients is the willingness to challenge the old stories:

🌀 “I have to do it all on my own.”
🌀 “It’s selfish to want more.”
🌀 “I should be grateful for what I have.”
🌀 “I missed my chance.”

These beliefs might feel true, but they are not truth.

Nicola has walked this path herself — rewriting her own inner narrative from martyrdom and guilt to agency and self-trust. And she shows women how to do the same, with compassion and without shame.

Listen to the full episode for a nourishing and honest conversation with Nicola Rae, filled with stories, gentle truth-telling, and an invitation to begin where you are.

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